“Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love and fearlessness. If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love” – Stevie Wonder

“No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother. If it is both, he is twice blessed indeed” – Godfrey Winn

“She is the creature of life, the giver of life, and the giver of abundant love, care and protection. Such are the great qualities of a mother. The bond between a mother and her child is the only real and purest bond in the world, the only true love we can ever find in our lifetime” – Ama H. Vanniarachchy

 

Three days ago, the world celebrated International Women’s Day. Across the nation, many churches also celebrated Mother’s Sunday or Mothering Sunday, as the case may be. It was an occasion when kids and men all over the nation did their best to appreciate their mothers and all the women in their lives. It was an opportunity to call them (no matter how far away they were) to tell them how much you appreciate them and how great your love for them was. Even if na lie wey you lie, e no matter. Just call them and appreciate them…that’s all. And maybe afterwards, go back to your godless ways. Na between you and God jor!

I have a thousand reasons for writing this ode to our mothers. Now mind you, this is not a typical ode filled with elaborately structured poetic verses and lyrical stanza. Naa, naa, naa…this is just me writing paragraph after paragraph the wonderful things mothers did (and still do) for us.

It’s not as if I don’t have other things I could write an ode to. I could write an ode to my favorite whiskey, I could write an ode to the dog I ran over a week ago, I could write an ode to the Qu’ran…but c’mon, mothers deserve this ode. On a more serious note, they deserve an ode every single day. But we’d just leave the ode for today, alright! So here I am, on a cold night in a police cell, scribbling notes on a paper, writing an ode to the remarkable people that brought us into the world.

Mothers are amazing, they have outstanding powers, they can multitask without batting an eyelid…I could go on and on and on. One time in the past, I called my mum aside after watching her move so effortlessly from one task to another, without caring so much how stressed-out she was. I wanted to know how they did those things. She just smiled, told me to leave her alone, and continued working. It was the best decision she took to continue working because if peradventure she answered that first question, I would have gone ahead to ask other questions over the next couple of minutes. Incredible Me!

I feel God made mothers on the day he planned to rest. But on a second thought, he realized he hadn’t made mothers and decided to do so. In the presence of the cherubs, Angel Michael, Angel Gabriel, Angel Mgbirigba and the others, he proceeded to carefully and meticulously create them.

Child rearing, to me, is the most important job in the world. I also guess it is the hardest. Yet, mothers are amazing in doing this tough job effectively. Kids get dirty and soiled every freaking day yet the mothers make sure to clean ‘em up everyday day so they’d stay fresh. One time, it was raining cats and dogs and there was this kid jumping, running around and playing in the rain. As if that was not enough, he rolled over in the mud and seemed to be having fun. He was smiling from cheek to cheek until the mother came. And what did she do? After staring at the kid for long, took him by the arms and walked him into the house. A few minutes later, the muddy kid was all fresh but wasn’t smiling anymore. He wished to go back into the rain and continue playing. If na me, I for beat that pikin well well dat day eh. And na him go wash him cloth. But as I sat there watching this scenario play out, I realized this was what the woman would be doing over the years until the child became wiser and older. Kai, e no easy, aswear! And with that, I doffed my cap for the woman and proceeded to pour some of the beer I was drinking on the bare floor, as a tribute to women everywhere.

When the child is ill, mothers don’t care what the consequence of what she plans to do is or what effect it would have on her. As long as the child would be okay, she would proceed to stick her mouth over the baby’s little nostrils and sucks the mucus out. As long as it would bring relief to the baby, she would do it. Isn’t that amazing?

Mothers have been puked on, spit-up on, and peed on, while changing clothes up to six times a day. Mothers have changed diapers twelve times a day almost without swearing; they have folded loads of laundry everyday for years while throwing their hands up in despair. Isn’t that amazing?

Mothers would sit on the couch watching the Teletubbies, Barney and other boring kiddies’ show, while pretending to enjoy such shows. As long as it would make the kids happy, she would do that. Mothers would gladly sacrifice any of the pleasures of life just to carve out the best for the family. They invent meals, they work magic, and they discover new ways of doing things. Isn’t that amazing?

In the morning, mothers dress up the kids, knead bread, sweep the kitchen floor, and clean out the junk drawer, in all of 20 minutes. And afterwards, pack the kid’s lunch and drive her to school. And all the while, the husband is either reading a newspaper while taking a shit in the loo. Or he is watching the news on TV, while eating bread toast and sipping coffee. And in the afternoon, she diligently picks up the kids from school at the right time. I mean, mothers literally know how the kids are doing at every single moment. Isn’t that amazing?

The kids grow and with that come a lot of bullshits. But the mamas are patient as always, realizing it is part of development and are always at hand to offer their invaluable advice and help. They cry and shed a tear of joy with you; they share in your sadness and hope.

It is a pity I have to end this relatively short ode at this point. Most times, I still marvel at mothers – I call them superheroes in disguise. They double as best friends, counselors, therapists, costume-designers, hair stylists, coaches, all-round-solver-of-every-problems…I repeat, they are simply amazing. And funny thing is, I don’t think they would trade all these for anything in the world.

So as mothers all over the nation (and maybe, all over the world) dance around in celebration of motherhood, let us all raise of glasses of our favorite drinks, doff our hats and make a toast to these incredible women – Our Mothers. We wish them more happiness and joy as they celebrate.

Oh, I just realized I am in a police cell and there is no freaking glass to toast with. Damn!

 

PS: Please, this article is what it is. No be say the fathers no dey try o. So on Father’s day, I promise to also write an ode to them. Abeg, fathers…make una no too vex jor! Ifee baalu abago!

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